LIONS, TIGERS AND TORTS ... OH MY!

So I was checking out FARK News to relax my brain while I switch from torts to contracts. I was reading this article about a family in Kentucky who have a pet lion!!! Now normally I would read this and think what idiots they were and how this is likely to end in disaster, etc. I have gotten used to viewing the whole world from a "who has liability" standpoint since my 1L year.

However, this evening I suddenly began to hear Bob Feinberg's voice telling me in his suave PMBR style that:

The possessor of a wild animal is held strictly liable for the harm or injury that the animal causes another person. Injury fleeing from a wild animal is still proximately related to the animal’s dangerous propensities and you can recover.

So I continue to read and find out that:

Simba's cage is a chain link fence with electric wiring. The wires will give Simba a shock if he tries to get out, but neighbors said that's not good enough.

You betcha it's not good enough because according to Feinberg:

Defanged or de-clawed lions and such don’t count, a wild animal still triggers the strict liability, you cannot domesticate a wild animal, and no amount of prevention or safeguard will save you.

Of course this is a very obvious example, but my problem is I did this with every article. I can't NOT think about the bar at this point and I can't decide if that is a good thing or a bad thing. I guess I should just be happy I remembered so much. Of course you realize that this now means that there won't be any mention of wild animals in two weeks. But I can hope ....

As an aside, the owners say that "Simba" [oh that's original] is very "laid back". Uh-huh, suuure he is, until he decides that the little dog he is sharing a cage with is a scoobie snack. And I was wondering something, since when do you feed lions BREAD?! I'm thinking there is not a bakery in sight in the African plains.

And just how does one acquire a lion? It's not like you can go down to the local Petsmart and pick one up. If you could I bet they would also have "Lion Chow" or something because lions certainly should not be eating bread! Now I am completely off topic, because now I am wondering how the in-store lion obedience classes would work. Do you offer them treats as a reward? Does everyone have to bring their own chair and whip? And imagine the litter box!!

OK, that's enough mental meandering. Before you know it I will be off on a rant about the South Carolina guy who had his toddler in the apartment with his pet alligator and all his drug paraphernalia. That sounds like a crim/torts hypo from hell, no?

Anyway, Contracts awaits.